Friday, 16 April 2010

Random Details on the Races of the Coin

(the Coin, by the way, is the name of the planet my current D&D campaign is set on. More explanation on the subject will be forthcoming at a future point)

Dwarves:

Dwarves don't pray, or worship gods. They acknowledge that the gods exist, and that they're very powerful, but they draw the line at actually being deferential to such beings. What they will do, however, is bargain.

The closest thing to a dwarf prayer would go something like this:
"Hey, any gods who might be listening, I'd be willing to, I dunno, forge you some neat stuff in the afterlife, if you'd nudge things my way right now. Not that I need it, mind you, it's just that it would be awfully convenient..."

Dwarf clerics should probably be more accurately called "professional god bargainers".

Elves: Nobody has ever seen a fat elf. Some conspiracy theorists believe that all the ugly-looking elves are rounded up and kept hidden in dungeons beneath the elven capital of Yendys. Everybody else just thinks this is more evidence of the elves being an entire species that is annoyingly lucky.

Most elves are incapable of growing facial hair. They are perpetually aggravated that the human wizard community refuses to take their mages seriously as a result.

Gnomes (aka Halflings): Gnomes are by their basic nature, obsessive. Most people don't notice, because the average gnome obsesses over living a quiet, comfortable, unremarkable life in a nice little pastoral hamlet, and eating five square meals a day.

Adventuring gnomes are mostly those weirdos who become obsessed with travel, money, magic, power, bloodshed or similar, rather than pies.

Orcs and Half-Orcs
Orcs are an artificial species, crafted long ago by some forgotten Dark Lord from a mixture of goblin and human biology and beer. They have gone extinct several times since then, but as the recipe for their manufacture has been passed down from evil wizard to evil wizard, such reprieves haven't lasted.

Orcs can be found in two locations - in the service of an evil magic user with a spare vat to make them in, or skulking about in otherwise uninhabited regions after their dark master has been offed by some adventurers.

Half-orcs occur when a human and an orc love each other very, very much.

All greenskins enjoy singing.

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