Thursday, 5 July 2012
[To Coin a World] Underworld Portal
I do know of a spell that will let you do that, open a portal to the beyond. While the spell itself is not that hard, barely more difficult than a good old fireball incantation, it does have some... challenges associated with it. For starters, the spell won't work anywhere on this world. Thankfully, you can get around that by sailing to the very edge of the Coin, casting the spell so that the portal appears off the edge. Best to make sure you're going at a fair clip when you do it though. You don't want to come up short and fall into open space.
Oh, and if you think sailing a ship off the very edge of the world is difficult, just wait till you try coming back..."
Wednesday, 27 June 2012
[To Coin a World] Pyresburg
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A rather confused artist's impression of the city |
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A quiet evening |
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Must be Tuesday... |
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Yep, definitely Tuesday. |
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Sam on a typical day. |
- Puzzled tourist from some far off land, probably about to be fleeced.
- Studded Brotherhood gang-members loitering around.
- Wannabe Red Mask running from the Watch. Is aiming more for dashing rather than fleeing.
- The Pyresbaron's bright red coach, surrounded by guards.
- Sound of a distant explosion. Anybody nearby will mutter "bloody wizards".
- Watch patrol, seemingly loaded for bear. Will be puzzled if asked why they're heavily armed, as this is standard equipment.
- Beggars. Almost certainly collecting information for somebody.
- Sam Pander and his water-cart.
- Gonzo Loudfeet nosing about.
- Weird noises from nearby drain.
- See That Random Harlot Sub-table
- Fight. 50% chance scheduled bar-fight, 50% chance flashy sword-duel.
Sunday, 29 January 2012
[To Coin a World] The Dwarven Agricultural Revolution
-150 years: clever dwarven runesmith inscribes rune for sun on seeds of barley plant, leading to plants that can grow out of the sun
-100 years: sun-free barley farming becomes reasonably common in the dwarven mountain holds. surface farming communities are abandoned (ruins!), holds become more crowded as the dwarven population grows
-50 years: growing population pressures spark massive social discontent among suddenly large population of young dwarves, leading to internecine clan feuds and gross migration out of dwarven communities and into human cities
-50 years to present: human and dwarven communities become more tightly integrated thanks to migration. dwarven holds develop new mines and mining techniques that vastly increase the supply of metals across Spindewick. pri
Tuesday, 17 January 2012
[To Coin a World] Languille

Languille's unique culture is the product of a centuries-long dance between the sun kingdom of Soleille and the great continent of Zwuyala. Decades ago, the city was ruled by the Solaise nobility, who formed an elegant and graceful cream on top of an underclass of oppressed Zwuyalan slaves and poor Reman laborers. But that was before Big Tuesday, and the Mort Reveille; the day the dead walked out of the river.
To escape the rage of the Sun King at the loss of one of his most prized cities, Baron Tuesday sort the protection of the Waldorf Ceasar, Emperor Otto von Karlswick, and in an unusual fit of competence and unity, the Reunited Imperium's armies found it in themselves to stop fighting against one another and smash the Sun King's armies at the Battle of Dunniewadér. And so it was that Languille passed from Soleille to the Remanschreik, and the dead went back to sleep on the river floor... for the most part.
Decades have passed, and the city has settled languidly into its new form. It may be true that Baron Tuesday is technically a lich, or a vampire, or a werewolf, or a black-hearted necromancer, or the Lord of Hell himself; but he is undoubtedly a popular ruler, at least outside of the Caged Ones or "Cajuns".
Perhaps no-one is surprised that, as the tables have turned, the newly-powerful black bourgeoise have begun to emulate their former oppressors, and the lily-white Cajun underclass have adopted several Zwuyalan traditions. The court of the Baron Tuesday seeps with all the elegance and opulence of a stately Lumiéran ball, from the overwrought corsetry to the elaborate masquerie, while the gutters and sewers of the Cagé Quartier, Cajun rootworkers delve into ancient Zwuyalana soul magick.
- Gang of wandering sailors, fresh off the boat, looking for thrills in the Lurid Quartier
- Zombi labourers clumsily unloading a merchant's cart
- Huge jazz funeral parade winding its way to Cemetery Hill
- Exquisitely beautiful painted ladies from the Red Windmill, dragging what looks to be a corpse
- Doc Delamour and his ambulatory carriage, selling his wares
- Tattooed Cajun heavies in leather jackets, enforcing a protection racket for Monsieur Brique
- Cajun rootworker disguised as a beggar
- Fetid swarm of swamp rats spilling out onto the streets
- Ancient gothic tenement collapsing into the swamp
- Sedan chair bearing the arms of the Baron Tuesday
Friday, 6 January 2012
[To Coin a World] Selected Gods
Particular thanks to Jeff Rients, from whom I pilfered Omnia and the Frog gods.
The "Good":
Lord Aon
Chief god, general grumpy sky dad and master of lightning, Aon (or another suspiciously similar deity) is worshiped in almost every human culture on the Coin, although they vary as to which goddess is his wife and queen (leading to some interesting and very heated arguments). He is typically shown with two animal companions, although what these are varies - in the Hublands, he is shown with an owl (representing cunning) and a bear (representing badassery), while in the League heartlands he’s more often shown with an eagle and a lion. Combinations of these creatures might be considered holy gifts (griffons) or profane abominations (owlbears).
Hippatara
The primary goddess of rivers and fertility around the Friendly sea, and often depicted as the wife of Aon. Hippopotami are considered holy animals by her faith, and ancient depictions of her often show her as a ponderously-proportioned anthropomorphized hippo, although the modern church frowns on this. They also frown on the worship of Khadahan (see below).
Areena
A martial goddess, Areena’s creed promotes physical and moral purity, as well as crusades against evil-doers (or, if there aren’t any evil-doers around, foreign faiths), and the justice of trial by combat. There are several orders of warriors devoted to her, in the League and in a few other countries. Invariably, they are single-gender groups. Unicorns are considered holy to her faith (whereas everybody else thinks they’re crazy and dangerous). Her followers heartily dislike the followers of Frikk.
Khadahan
Another god of rivers, as well as sunbathing and long baths, the Crocodile-headed Khadahan was mostly only worshiped in Aratha until a recent miracle at the temple in Al-Harraj unified the splintered factions of his faith, and expanded his portfolio into the realm of fertility. His faithful are now trying to spread his worship around the Friendly sea, setting up bathhouse-shrines in several major cities. As a result, they’re in direct competition with the church of Hippatara.
Frikk
Goddess of war, alcohol, and carousing in general, Frikk’s faith is main popular in the Hublands, where the locals really appreciate those things. Where Areena’s warrior-clerics promote purity and honour, Frikk’s worshippers are encouraged to brawl, drink, sing loudly, and do whatever they want so long as it doesn’t hurt anybody (unless those people are your enemies, in which case, go right ahead). Areena’s faithful are generally considered to be too uptight, and should be mocked and needled wherever possible. Chainmail is considered a gift from her to mortals, and holy folk almost always wear it (often in far smaller quantities than would be considered sensible or proper, to show their faith in the goddess).
The Bad:
The Solar Dragon
The Solar Dragon is sort of a borderline Dark God. On the one hand, his Sollais faithful abhor all other dark gods. On the other, they abhor ALL other gods, claiming them false and demonic, while periodically sacrificing virgins and enemies of the state to him (by guillotine). The Sun Prince of Solielle is considered to be his chosen leader on the mortal plane. Images of a more feathery version of the Solar Dragon have also been found on some old temples in Zwuyala.
Iggujugglyoo
Another strange and unpleasant god from the jungles of Zwuyala, Iggujugglyoo, also known as He of the Thousand Teeth is a bloodthirsty god of carnivorous dinosaurs, particularly velociraptors. Little else is known about him, except that his worshippers tend to utterly crazed.
Rzngl the Unvoweled
Depicted as an elf with the heads of two deer, each able to shoot burning rays from their eyes, this demon prince (or princess, it seems to vary) enjoys blood sacrifices in a pleasantly woodland setting.
Tormentara
A goddess of temptation and corruption, Tormentara offers mortals their wildest desire, but always finds a way to take that desire to such an extreme as to be horrifying for the unfortunate that caught her attention. Her worship is both open and prevalent amongst the Dark Elves, who hope to placate her evil whims.
Gi’Am
A demon god of earth, stone, monsters and deathtraps, Gi’Am’s dungeon-temples are a favourite target for adventuring parties. Which seems to be just the way he likes it...
The Frog Gods of Chaos
Not a single god, but a multitude of extra-dimensional amphibious horrors devoted to corrupting or destroying the universe as a whole. Thankfully, they’re so chaotic that they often work at cross-purposes.
The Peculiar:
Urinor
God of sewers and plumbing, Urinor is among the youngest gods on the Coin, his faith only having existed for a few decades, at most, since his slightly unhinged prophet, a dwarven adventurer, began spreading his word. He mostly receives prayers in the form “Oh God, I really need a privy”.
Roadael
Different cultures differ as to whether Roadael is a demigod, a saint, or an archangel, but whatever the case, he is the patron of porters, hirelings, and servants, and is said to aid the other gods in preparing for manifestation on the mortal plane.
Omnia
Goddess of Everything Not Covered By Other Gods. As a result, the things Omnia is responsible for are strange, eclectic, and generally only come up in very unusual and specific situations. Her followers are rare and a bit weird, but are mostly quite nice, except for an shadowy (and insane) cult that wishes to destroy all the other gods so as to expand her power.
Kwaaak
The Bird God of Birds, Kwaaak’s faith dwindled to almost non-existance a thousand years ago, after he went insane over wizards developing flying brooms. His church was resurrected recently by an elvish princess, and is making headway promoting him as the (much more sane and reasonable) god of airborne travel in general.
Friday, 23 December 2011
[To Coin a World] Magic Weapons of the Friendly Sea
Magebiter
Believed to be one of the many malfuctioning magic items left over from the Mage Wars, this sword seems to possess a rudimentary, animalistic personality, and a burning hatred of wizards of all stripes, seeking their deaths above all other things.
The Revenant Dirk
The origins of the Dirk are unclear, but the work of a Necromancer would not be far-fetched as an assumption. So long as the blade remains lodged in a dead body, that body will be animated and attempt to kill all living beings nearby.
Bitter Frost
Forged by the frost giants as a peace offering to the dwarven king in ages past, Bitter Frost bears the numbing cold of the wastes where it was forged, freezing any water that it contacts. It is also said to speak, and lament its own existence as a weapon of war.
The Twin Flails of Chastity
Quenched in the blood of a rabid unicorn, these two light flails are specially effective against those who could be considered loose with their affections.
Mindshiv
Found in the dungeons under the ruins of Xylarthen's Tower, this greenish hilt-less sword is said to be able to speak directly to the mind of the wielder, and sense the hostile intent of those nearby. It seeks new experiences, and if bored, may sabotage the current wielder so that it may be looted by somebody more interesting.
The Four Orcish Pirate Axes:
given as a gift by some dark and unpleasant god to the (now deceased) mutant leader of the orcish pirates known as the Bloody Axes of Powerful Killing, they appear similar in design, but each bears a different power.
The Axe of Power
This axe is able to strike with incredible force, quite out of proportion to the strength of the wielder, but is draining to use.
The Axe of Blood
Victims of this axe find their wounds bleed more freely than would be expected, and are difficult to heal.
The Axe of Killing
This axe can sense when a being is near death, and unerringly seeks to deal the final blow.
The Axe of Axes
When swung, this axe creates duplicates of itself, allowing it to be tossed at enemies as many times as the wielder wishes. The duplicates vanish after a short time.
Friday, 9 December 2011
[To Coin a World] Our Dragons are... diffferent?
Dragons breath fire.
Of course, there's quite a bit of variation as to how they do it. Some create a high-pressure gout of flame a hundred meters long, some spit fireballs that explode, some squirt flaming liquid, and some exhale clouds of smog that they then ignite with an electrical discharge. So, while fireproof armour will be invaluable against any dragon, the fire delivery method it has can change other tactical decisions.
Occasionally something will go wrong with the internal furnace of a dragon, usually while it's growing up, causing it to exhale toxic sludge or blasts of lightning. Other dragons consider such creatures hideous degenerates and try to kill them wherever possible.
Dragons are NOT immune to fire.
Dragonhide is very tough, turning aside most weapons, and it is also magic-resistant, turning away a fair number of spells. But, while it is quite resistant to heat, it is not totally fireproof, so a dragon can wade through a burning building, but will still be hurt by the breath of a fellow dragon. Or a large pile of explosives.
Most Dragons LOATH water.
Possibly this might have something to do with the fact they're creatures of fire. Or possibly they just don't like getting water under their scales. Either way, they avoid getting wet whenever they can. This is, in fact, why most dragons have their lairs in caves or dungeons rather than places open to the sky - while being able to fly straight up would be a huge tactical advantage, no dragon is going to sleep somewhere he might get rained on.
Having said that, they're not allergic to it or anything. In fact, if a dragon can overcome it's dislike of the substance, their sleek shape, huge lungs, and vast strength make them excellent swimmers.
Their life-cycle is very uneven.
It takes a dragon only a month or two to grow from a two-foot-long hatchling to a small-house-sized monstrosity, a period during which they are constantly hungry, and will eat literally anything in their immediate vicinity that they can chew (which, considering how hard their teeth are, is basically anything at all). However, once they reach that size, they grow very slowly. As they age, they get bigger, smarter, and lazier. Thankfully for the people of the Coin, once they reach a certain size, the dragon's internal systems seem to become self-sustaining, and they refuse to actually wake up for anything less than a direct attack on their person.
They're Magical, but can't do magic
Dragons are very magical. That's why they can fly despite their weight, can breath fire, can grow scales as hard as steel, and so on. It's also why they have such a huge variation in physical construction within the one species. But, like most inherently magical species, they can't actually cast spells like a human wizard (in fact, it might actually be humanity's lack of inherent magic that lets them do that, but that's a theory for another day). They certainly cannot change shape at will.
Wednesday, 7 December 2011
Arrows of Dragonslaying
Setting aside converted siege weapons, asbestos-coated armour and the rare wizard both powerful enough to battle a dragon and crazy enough to try, the best equalizer are magically prepared arrows of dragonslaying.
Admittedly, the name is a bit of a misnomer, as they can't actually kill a dragon except by a truly lucky shot, but unlike normal arrows they entirely ignore the dragon's ridiculously tough hide, and cause debilitating pain quite out of proportion to the amount of damage they inflict. These features are what they're sought for. Being able to hit a dragon's armour and still cause it to fall out of the sky from sheer shock is a big help.
Perhaps ironically, they're quite rare due to the fact they're made out of dragon parts.
Before the magic spell that imbues the arrows with their power can be cast, the heads of the arrows have to be made from dragon claws (in case you were wondering, a given dragon has from six to twenty-two claws, depending on its physical layout).
The next stage, once the heads have been made and affixed to a suitable shaft is to soak the arrows in the still-warm blood of a recently killed dragon.
Because the claws are even harder than the dragon's hide and filing them down to the proper shape can take days, and the blood cannot be more than half an hour old, for every quiver of arrows, two dragons have to slain.
Which explains why they're so amazingly expensive.
Sunday, 27 November 2011
Blackpowder on the Coin
Friday, 18 November 2011
Other food and drink of the Coin
Gruznuk, or Orcish Death Spirit
Orcs are horrible cannibalistic creatures, and love alcohol, so it's probably no surprise that their most famous beverage is actually made from fermented internal organs, usually the livers of the brewer's enemies. The stuff is horrific, almost undrinkable to any non-orc, and even for orcs it can occasionally be lethal. The orcs see this as a plus, though. If a drinker is slain by a bottle of gruznuk, his internal organs are removed, fermented, and then poured back into the bottle, and the defeated orc's name is added to the label. Besting a bottle that has defeated all prior drinkers is considered a heroic feat by the murderous greenskins.
Dematerialized Food
An attempt by wizards to make light and easily portable rations for long journeys, this was once normal food that has had its very physical existence removed, making it a good deal lighter. In fact, it typically appears to be a completely empty paper bag. It is made edible by adding any kind of solid material to the bag, which turns into the specified kind of food.
...Usually. Live frogs are still technically food, right?
Monday, 7 November 2011
[To Coin a World] Giant Rats
The giant rats that can be found infesting anywhere liable to be explored by low-level adventurers are the result of a dwarven attempt to breed something big enough to supply a decent steak...
Tuesday, 25 October 2011
To Coin a World: Genie Servants

Most adventurers know of Genies, how they are magical beings from another plane, and that they can be bound to serve mortals, even granting wishes.
Fact is, most adventurers outside Aratha have no idea how the nitty-gritty of all that works. They assume that genies are just like demons.
They're not. While a demon can be bound by magical circles, and compelled to perform services, either for free or in exchange for sacrificies, depending on the power of the binding wizard, genies cannot be bound by wizards at all. They can be summoned, but are under no compulsion to obey the summoner.
However, genies have rituals known only to themselves that can bind other genies, forcing them to serve whoever possesses a specified binding object, usually a lamp, amulet or ring. Genie lords often trade these indentured slaves to wealthy Sultans or powerful sorcerers on the mortal plane, in exchange for goods or magic that can't be found on the genie's home dimension.
Occasionally a noble genie will be bound to grant wishes. This is reserved for only the most hated enemies of those doing the binding. Wishes can only be granted on the mortal plane, and each wish granted tears away a third of the genie's very essence, with the third wish either killing the genie, or leaving it a withered husk. Understandably, these genies are bitter, and will twist the wording of wishes to cause as much pain and sorrow on the wisher as they can.
Friday, 21 October 2011
[To Coin a World] The Brotherhood of Sin Eaters
Due to their diet, the Brothers are universally gluttonous, and after a meal, will often suffer the dark urges the latest supplicant. At least until they partake of a holy digestive wafer.
Friday, 22 July 2011
[Troubles & Treasures] Class Acts: The Hoplite

Hoplite
- Defend your allies and your city with shield and spear.
- Live as a free and honorable citizen-soldier of the Mynacean city-states.
- Be equally dangerous in hand-to-hand and ranged combat.
Thursday, 21 July 2011
[To Coin a World] The Tax Monks
Monday, 18 July 2011
[To Coin a World] The Disenchanted Forest
Encounters in the Disenchanted Forest:
- A completely normal, non-talking, non-mutated animal.
- A rather confused lycanthrope that has become a completely normal man, at least temporarily. Probably looking for some clothes.
- A group of wizards doing research on the area. Their spells don't work, so they're carying ridiculous amounts of armour and weaponry to compensate. They're very jumpy, because they can hear off in the distance...
- A tyrannosaurus rex. It used to be a dragon. Now it's very stupid, and very angry.
Sunday, 17 July 2011
[To Coin a World] A Brief History of the Grand Reman League


